Get Out of My Head.

I am really, really, hand-to-god-hallelujah-singing SICK of missing V.


For fucks sake. Not worth the mental anguish at this point.

That's all! Happy Wednesday. I'm off to run.

xo
MK

Again with catching up! I was in Seattle Friday and Saturday, with not much down time.  So, I will catch up now.  I suppose I should give myself some flexibility, updating is hard when I'm running all over the place. Seattle was good, very quick, saw a lot of people, and was undoubtedly emotionally draining (social meeting with V maybe played a part in that).  It was also a productive trip, so for that I am thankful. Now! Onto bidness:

Friday:  Friday I was meeting with advisors at UW to learn about their programs, and what I should be doing to be able to go back to school as a post baccalaureate student.  It was super interesting, left me with a ton of questions that I will need to research the answers for, and was a great big step in the right direction of me getting back to school.  I'm thankful that I'm finally able to start down the road of actually being able to go back to school.  I have no idea when I'll be able to apply to an actual University and enroll full time (vs going to a community college part time, which I'm starting in Jan), but - baby steps.

Saturday: Saturday I woke up at my friend, T's, house, in a comfy warm bed.  T lives south of seattle, and a block off the sound.  Her house is gorgeous, her mom (who she lives with) is a doll, and I'm thankful that we are friends.  I've known her for 11 years, we lost touch for awhile, but reconnected when we realized we both were living in WA.  I'm glad for her friendship, and her and her mom's hospitality!

Bonus: I am thankful I made it home safe last night! about 15 miles from home I ran into bad weather, it had been snowing for awhile, and freezing cold.  In a one mile stretch I saw four bad accidents, at least 2 were flip-overs.  It was slow going those last 15 miles, but my lil subaru was great!

Today: I finished my christmas shopping! At least, the store-buying portion of it.  I totally slacked this year, and waited far too long - but everything that requires actually entering a store, is done! I still need to do some online shopping, but maybe I can get that  taken care of tonight.

Night.
xo
MK

Horchata Noir

It's Friday, and I am so thankful for that fact alone. I haven't slept well the past few nights, and I am looking forwarding to swallowing a couple Advil PM and passing out until my body wakes me. (hopefully later than 4am tomorrow...). But it being Friday can't be my reason, it's too easy.

Coming up with something to be thankful for today was kind of hard. While there is plenty I'm thankful for in my everyday life: friends, family, health, job, etc. I also think those are too easy. Perhaps they'll make an appearance at some point, but I'd rather look for something less obvious.

After work today, I picked up my car, Horchata Noir, from the auto body shop. Her hatchback was dented and scratched a few weeks ago while in Seattle. That guy I was dating? We'll call him V. Well, the car was parked outside his apartment building, his motorcycles parked behind the car. Somehow, one of the motorcycles FELL into the back of HN, denting and scratching her hatchback. V was very apologetic, felt awful and offered to pay for it. Frankly, if my car was a bit older than 2 months, I probably wouldn't have cared and would have passed on his offer. But HN is just a sweet young thing, and too young to be zipping around all banged up. V broke up with me four days later. OUCH. Perhaps I'll talk more of V later, but for the purposes of this post, know that I really like(d) him and was not happy when things took the turn that they did. He was my closest friend out here, the person I spent the most time with, talked with the most and felt the closest to. Losing that friendship at this fragile point of life was painful, and I still miss it and him. Adding insult to injury was that my brand spankin' ass new car was fucked up.

ANYWAY. I finally took HN to the shop this past Monday to be prettied up. The shop did a great job (sans missing one of the back emblems, which they destroyed while removing it to paint the back, but promise to replace it, it's on order), and there is no evidence a motorcycle, V, or any reminder of that crappy week left on my pretty, pretty HN. $527.40 isn't so high a price to have that reminder erased, and have HN sparkle and shimmer like she should.

Where am I going with this? I'm not thankful for spending $527.40 that I decidedly do NOT have* to fix my car that was fucked up through no fault of my own, I am also not thankful for being without a car for 4 days. I am thankful I have Horchata Noir at all, and all that she allows me to do. It seems silly to be thankful for something so materialistic, but she is so much more than a material good to me.

My living situation doesn't offer much privacy, or much in the way of alone time, which is something I greatly desire, and need to keep myself happy. Horchata Noir can provide this for me. I can plug my ipod into her and create my own little world while I just drive and drive. She brings me a sense of freedom; an ability to escape the town I'm in and explore anywhere I chose at the drop of a hat and $40 on a tank of gas. She is always ready to take me wherever I go, and I am so, so thankful I have that freedom.

I am also very thankful for Advil PM, but to use that as my reason, would also be cheating.

Night.

xo

MK

*V crashed his other motorcycle into an SUV about 2 weeks after the HN incident. Most importantly, V is okay. I've dropped the issue about my car, assuming if he wants to own up to it, he will. I am broke and don't have the extra $527.40 lying around, but I'll manage, HN needed to be fixed.